Cartoonists With Attitude

Really trying to pare down the content of these Moron posts. As any freelancer or cartoonist will tell you, the amount of time you have to do the things you want to do is finite. After you do the actual work (i.e. the cartoon), and the various little administrative business chores every week (organizing and whatnot), there are very few hours left to work on the big projects that will grow your business. These Moron posts are one of the things that should go for me… but I know I would have a hard time not talking about the issues I’m dealing with in at least a bit more detail than I cover in the cartoons.

So anyway… man, this week’s cartoon was a pain. For some reason, it took forever for me to get this one together. I think it’s because I have never really been into “high fantasy” medieval tales of knights and wizards and stuff. I’ve never seen any of the Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter movies from start to finish. Cartoons like this one are a lot easier, because I’ve been a giant Star Wars nerd my whole life and I know those movies backwards and forwards.

A few snippets:

• Scott Ritter:
  

  The success of the surge is pure fantasy, a fancy bit of illusion that would do David Copperfield proud, but not the people of Iraq or the United States. The surge addresses events in Iraq based upon short-term objectives (i.e., reducing the immediate level of violence) without resolving any of the deep-seated, long-term issues that promote the violence to begin with. It is like placing a Band-Aid on a gaping chest wound.

• Faiz Shakir:
  

  the right wing is already beginning to declare victory. In November, after a trip to Iraq, Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) began declaring that “we’ve succeeded militarily.” His traveling companion, Sen. Joe Lieberman (I-CT) agreed, bellowing that “we are winning” because “we have made progress” in “one of the most remarkable turnarounds in modern military history.”

• Glenn Greenwald:
  

  No matter what else is true, our sprawling imperialism — as has been true for every Empire in history — is simply unsustainable. The very idea of staying in Iraq for the next several decades with tens of thousands of American troops, while we lavishly fund the grotesquely corrupt and un-American Private Republican Army of Blackwater, is both infeasible and self-destructive.

• Juan Cole:
  

  When viewed from the vantage point of grand strategy, the Iraq War is as much a failure as it has always been. If someone came to you six years ago and said that for only $2 trillion, you could have for your colony a burned out country, a failed state, and a semi-permanent incubator of terrorism and hatred against the US, would you have ponied up the money? That’s what you’ve got, and that is what it cost you. Detroit could have used some of that money. New Orleans could have used some of that money. [emphasis added]

  …

  And anyway, if the US government had thrown the $2 trillion and more that Iraq will end up costing at green energy development, both we and the earth would have been far better off.

• Andrew Bacevich:
  

  In President Bush’s pithy formulation, the United States is now “kicking ass” in Iraq. The gallant Gen. David Petraeus, having been given the right tools, has performed miracles, redeeming a situation that once appeared hopeless. Sen. John McCain has gone so far as to declare that “we are winning in Iraq.”

• Charles Lewis and Mark Reading-Smith:
  

  President George W. Bush and seven of his administration’s top officials, including Vice President Dick Cheney, National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice, and Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, made at least 935 false statements in the two years following September 11, 2001, about the national security threat posed by Saddam Hussein’s Iraq.

• One more thing: check out this incredible chart from the NYT on the military and police deaths in Iraq last year.

Please Kill Me

A spam email from The Nation:

In an effort to illuminate the importance of literary and cultural matters of the moment, TheNation.com has just launched a new fortnightly column.

The Short of It will be the home of riffs, rants, raves, obituaries, reportage, appreciations, light essays, character sketches, vignettes and digressions. The inspiration is the urban sketch found on the back pages of daily journals and magazines in the nineteenth century.

The debut piece by Barry Schwabsky explores the new New Museum–the building, the opening show, the bookstore and more. Coming up are pieces about the music playlist of Tom Stoppard’s Rock ‘n’ Roll; a rave about the jazz musician Albert Ayler; an appreciation of Doc Humes, novelist, beat, and old Paris Review hand; a lament about the decline of academic lit crit and a rant about mandarins who lament the supposed decline of reading.

Bullshit is the ultimate unstoppable vampire monster that will kill us all.

Oh, and:

There are no “literary or cultural matters of the moment” that are of “importance.” Fiction died with Steinbeck. Photography killed painting; TV killed photography. Elvis and Chuck Berry and Howlin’ Wolf killed jazz, and thank God for that. Poetry never mattered.

There is more meaning in one Paul Verhoeven film than in the global history of “digressions.”

Death to pretension!

Who’s Afraid of Mike Huckabee?

There they go again.

Yesterday, the corporations that order the media around got their way. The best candidate, possibly America’s last chance for redemption and reform, John Edwards, was pushed out of the race—the victim of the media’s decision not to cover his campaign. Now they’re doing it on the Republican side.

My readers know where I stand on Huckabee. Still, despite his flaws—and they are grievous—he has been notable for introducing elements of populism and actual Christian concern for the poor and suffering into the Republican primary race. Unlike McCain and Romney, he isn’t a 100 percent corporate shill. Which makes him dangerous.

Here comes the Edwards treatment.

Consider this from today’s New York Times: “With Rudolph W. Giuliani and John Edwards withdrawing from the race, the two parties have what is, in effect, clean two-way battles for the nomination as they roar into this week leading into Tuesday, when 20 states will vote.

Point one: Huckabee was always more viable than Giuliani. He did, after all, win the Iowa caucuses. Giuliani didn’t win a single primary. And Huckabee polled higher than Giuliani all along. So Giuliani’s withdrawal logically leaves McCain, Romney and Huckabee. Except that the media wants to get rid of Huckabee.

Directly next to the above quote are poll results that directly contradict the framing of the GOP contest as a two-man race. Huckabee, according the Times’ own polls, is favored to win Georgia, Tennessee and Alabama. He’s running second in Missouri. He polls no less than nine percent—significant by any standard—in every state.

I’ve been watching politics my entire life. Never have I seen the media engage so brazenly in using its coverage to choose which candidates receive the attention they need to survive the primary process.

Cartoon for January 31

Watching Bush’s last State of the Union Address (OK, his last scheduled State of the Union Address) made me a tad wistful for the arrogant coup leader who threatened a military coup in 2000, suspended habeas corpus, legalized torture and signed himself the right to declare you an enemy combatant and have you murdered by government agents. Such small-bore initiatives! Such a sad spectacle!

If Bush leaves the public arena as scheduled in January 2009, it is safe to say that political cartoonists shan’t see his kind again in our lifetimes. He is what Nixon was to an earlier generation of political satirists: pure gold. Go not gently into that good political night, not-so-gentle fiend!

A vow to give the boot to criminal aliens has become an almost daily part of the New York senator’s presidential campaign spiel on overhauling the immigration system.

“Anybody who committed a crime in this country or in the country they came from has to be deported immediately, with no legal process. They are immediately gone,” Mrs. Clinton told a town hall meeting in Anderson, S.C., Thursday. [..] “No legal process,” the New York senator said at a forum in Tipton, Iowa, according to a political news outlet, the Politico. “You put them on a plane to wherever they came from.”

Katharine at Obsidian Wings points out:

If you read the full article, she does not, in fact, seem to be suggesting summary deportation in violation of the 5th amendment of any immigrant with a criminal conviction. This is just an applause line. But it reflects EXACTLY what I fear about the Clintons: the voters are anti-immigrant this year? Throw in an applause line about putting people on a plane without legal process. […]

“Deport the criminals!” sounds great in theory, but when you’re wondering if you actually have to draft a deportation order for someone who came to the United States as a six month old based on a fairly petty conviction, & reading the “don’t deport my daddy!” letters in his file, it looks rather different. When you’re trying to avoid having to draft an opinion that sends someone to rot in a godawful Haitian prison because of a marijuana conviction he got in high school, it looks rather different. Now, if you’re talking about felonies & people who are here illegally to begin with, that’s another thing; I don’t mind the Z visa restriction she’s talking about & I don’t think any candidate opposes it. But there’s a real possibility of Congress passing some crappy, mean, immigration bill at some point during the next 4 years, & I have zero confidence that she’d fight them on it.

(2) Where have I heard the circular “we don’t need a legal process because they’re bad people and don’t deserve it!” argument before? Hmm….

And then from immigration attorney Crankyliberal, discussing the current laws that Clinton apparently finds too merciful:

Do you want to know how many Lawful Permanent Residents I’ve helped lately who were in proceedings for a single drug possession conviction? These people have been here for over 20 years in most cases, have families and jobs, and screwed up. One of them was a bit stressed out after surviving cancer and also having to take care of her mother who is suffering from cancer. So she did some drugs. Right now, they have a chance to prove that they deserve to stay because the positive equities outweigh the negative. Now, that’s their only chance- if they ever screw up again, they’re removed, no questions asked. […]

…You want to deport the asylum seekers who have crimes? Are you saying you want to overturn the Convention Against Torture, a remedy founded in international law that may be availiable to ANYONE regardless of crime, provided they can prove to a judge that there is more than 50% chance that they will be TORTURED at the hands of their government?

Clinton’s rhetoric contributes to an anti-migrant atmosphere which has made it a real danger that (to pick one issue of many) some victims of domestic violence will be deported.

(You may wonder, reading this, where Obama stands on migrant issues. My impression is that he’s not perfect, but he’s better than other mainstream politicians, including Clinton. Even when it involves taking a political risk by supporting drivers licenses for undocumented immigrants.)

A combination of a headache, back ache and stomach ache is responsible for Thursday’s no-show, In Contempt-wise. I just don’t got it in me. I came home from work and fell instantly to sleep, waking only to grab one kid from a day time holding pen and get dinner started. Jenn, the other parent, came home with a screaming headache and the other child and finished dinner. We have taken turns laying down and attempting to persuade our children to respect their parents’ condition - with expected negative results.

I will now put the youngest child to bed. Where I will probably fall asleep before him.

*BACK FROM BARBADOS!!
And feeling pretty fine!! What a damn groovy time we had way down on the tiny little island in the Caribbean. Flying fish, mahi-mahi, Mount Gay Rum and Banks beer was consumed by the assload. Mmmm-mm!!

I don’t wanna say a whole lot about it cuz I’m gonna do a few strips. But I’ve got to thank Delia and Bird, who run the great Legend Gardens Condos. This is the place we stayed at up in Mullins Bay, just south of Speightstown. I cannot recommend this place any stronger than I am now. They provide the stuff you cannot get at some hotel. Genuine warmth. Go! It is paradise!! With monkeys and lizards and frogs and lots of other fun and freaky animals.

*I’M BURNING THE MIDNIGHT OIL..
..trying to catch up. I’m working to get the new K Chronicles to print this week so I can have it for my slideshow at the Euphrat Museum up in Northern California and at the Wondercon Comics Fest in San Francisco. The new title: I Left My Arse in San Francisco!!

*LETTER OF THE WEEK…

Hey man,
I really first became a fan when I caught one of your strips on Salon
about when you saw Thomas Dolby on tour. This was a couple of years back.
Though my favorite band is Talking Heads I couldn’t help but feel the love
in that comic. I’ve tried to follow the strip since then as much as
possible but I’m back in school finally doing my degree and I don’t get to
catch up all the time. So, the last time I caught a strip your wife had
just been told she had/may have cancer again and then I caught your strip
on the Barbados vacation. I hope that the vacation was as a result of your
wife’s health. I love the strip and I hope sincerely for the best for you
and yours. Oh, and I also caught your strip on Willie O’Ree. I’m a
Canadian, was raised on hockey and know that both hockey and tolerance are
part of our national myth. I wouldn’t have known about O’Ree if it weren’t
for you. Thank you.

P.
Victoria, British Columbia, Canada

(the wife is knocked up, not knocked down.-k.k.)

Ezra Klein explains why attempts by the Clinton campaign to seat Michigan and Florida delegates is self-serving and, btw, hypocritical:

When the Democratic National Committee decided to impose order on an out-of-control primary process by stripping Florida and Michigan of their delegates if they refused to return their primaries to their original dates, there were three individuals who could have restored the franchise to those states. Howard Dean, the Chairman of the DNC, could have changed his mind, or changed his proposed penalty. Even in the face of his intransigence, however, Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama could have simply refused his entreaty to avoid the offending states. A declaration by either that they disagreed with the DNC’s decision and would instruct their delegates to alter the rules at the convention and seat Florida and Michigan would have forced all the other candidates to do the same, and the DNC’s prohibition would have collapsed. The voters in Florida and Michigan would have attended speeches, and seen ads, and hosted a debate, and been able to make an informed choice

That didn’t happen. Clinton’s campaign manager backing the DNC, said, “We believe Iowa, New Hampshire, Nevada and South Carolina play a unique and special role in the nominating process, and we believe the DNC’s rules and its calendar provide the necessary structure to respect and honor that role.” So Florida and Michigan didn’t get their primaries. They didn’t get campaigns. They didn’t have serious Get Out The Vote efforts. And now, they’re being cynically used, the language of democracy revisited and dusted off in service of a power play for additional delegates. Where, rightly or wrongly, the campaigns agreed to deny them a primary, now Clinton’s campaign, which in Michigan won because they were the only campaign on the ballot and in Florida won because no one contested their lead, is demanding they be seated. The intervention did not come in time to give Florida and Michigan a full role in the democratic process, only in time to let the Clinton campaign benefit from their essential disenfranchisement.

Lawyers, Guns & Money has been having a rowdy debate about what the 1.6 million vote turnout in the Florida Democratic primary actually means. One thing I have not seen addressed is the impact of absentee ballots. A month or so ago, several Floridian Democrats sent in their ballots - how many were from Clinton supporters, how many from Obama? How does that compare to the breakdown of people who went to the polls on primary day? For that matter, how many voters would have actually bothered to show up had they seen real campaigns and get-out-the-vote drives, and had their delegates counted? Maybe we’ll never know. But I’m in the camp of people who feel disenfranchising Michigan and Florida could be a costly mistake for Democrats come November.

Yeah, like everyone who actually cares about issues, I’m bummed about Edwards dropping out. But I’m really upset about Rudy. The man had ZERO chance of winning, and would have provided endless amounts of rat-faced entertainment throughout the unbelievably long slog that will be the 2008 campaign. Transparently unqualified? Check. Mentioning 9/11 every third word? Check. Possible mob ties? Check. Dammit, don’t drop out, Rudy!

Everybody: Ruuu-dee, Ruuu-dee, Ruuu-DEE, Ruuu-DEE!, RUUU-DEE!, RUUU-DEE!!, RUU-DEE!!…

Please, just stop. Hillary Clinton is not going to ask Barack Obama to be Vice-President. It is not going to happen. It was never going to happen. There is no conceivable reason for it to happen.*

Barack Obama is very young, both as a person and a politician. If Hillary Clinton becomes president and is re-elected in 2012, Barack Obama will be 55 on the day of the 2016 election- five years younger than Clinton is right now. He can honestly wait for another four/eight years to run for president again, and especially with someone as dynamic as Hillary Clinton as president, it seems very unlikely the office of vice-president will be anywhere near as career-building as being a sitting senator in a Democratic majority for another four or eight years.

Likewise, as far as demographics go, Obama provides nothing to the ticket. He doesn’t give her any added states in the general. Overall, the biggest threat Clinton faces in the general against John McCain is not young voters, women, or minorities, but older white male voters who will gravitate to McCain like a bug lamp- half because they like McCain, and half because they really, really hate Hillary Clinton. Obama is not going to pull those voters in.

Barack Obama is dead weight to a Hillary Clinton candidacy, and Hillary Clinton is an anchor to the long-term ambitions of Barack Obama. Making him vice-president isn’t moving him up, it’s locking him away in a closet and I can’t believe Obama and his team aren’t smart enough to know all that.

* Okay, I’m saving this part for the end: obviously, there’s a conceivable reason to suggest Hillary make Obama her VP, and it’s mostly coming from pro-Hillary places (like, for example, TalkLeft). It’s pretty clear that in a “pulls in voters” sense, Clinton needs Obama a lot more than Obama needs Clinton. And it’s also pretty clear that the likely picks for Clinton- Bayh, Vilasack, maybe Richardson- are not going to make her candidacy inspiring during the primary. Basically, the idea that Obama will join the Hillary ticket makes the idea of voting for Hillary a lot more palatable. The problem is it’s as likely as the Kerry/McCain rumors of 2004, and just as stupid.