Archive for February, 2010

Aerial Activism

Sunday, February 28th, 2010 by Matt Bors

I’m a little late with a Joe Stack cartoon – my schedule sometimes does that to me – but I wanted to point out that white privilege apparently extends to domestic terrorism. Glenn Greenwald wrote well about the media’s inability to drop the T-word on a non-Muslim.

Just imagine the discussion if: Joe Stack was a radical Muslim. Joe Stack was a black militant Marxist opposed to capitalism. Joe Stack as he was, but with a larger plane that killed, say, one hundred people instead on one. Tinkering with one small factor such as race or religion is the deciding factor in whether conservatives will set up a Facebook shrine for the attacker or for the imposition of martial law. They are unprincipled maniacs.

I’m sure we’ll see more attacks soon.

Wednesday: More Tim Burton Remakes

It Had To Happen

Saturday, February 27th, 2010 by Matt Bors

Behold: an editorial cartoonist labels his cartoon an “editorial cartoon.”

Douglas MacGregor
The News-Press
Feb 27, 2010

Homophobes are Anally Fixated

Saturday, February 27th, 2010 by Kevin Moore

People — queer or straight — who support social equality for sexual and gender minorities tend to consider the subjects of their advocacy as whole people. For instance, one might think of a married couple of gay men as two goofy dudes who listen to Heavy Metal and play video games, like Brian and Steve on The Sarah Silverman Show.

The Sarah Silverman Program Thursday, 10:30pm / 9:30c
Brian’s Proposal
www.comedycentral.com

Joke of the Day Stand-Up Comedy Free Online Games

Homophobes are concerned with only one thing: who is putting what where. More specifically, they are really concerned with the unregulated interaction between the penis and the anus. Consider two recent examples. Barb Davis White has a little quip she uses to argue against the legitimacy of same-sex marriage as a civil rights issue:

Rosa Parks did not move to the front of the bus to support sodomy.

Technically, this is true. Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat to an arrogant white man. She had had a long day at work and simply did not want to stand up just so this obnoxious asshole could express his social supremacy. True, this act of resistance was not wholly spontaneous — Parks was active in her church and in the NAACP. But while she had an awful lot of issues on her mind at that moment, sodomy was probably not one of them.

All of which is totally irrelevant to the question of social equality for sexual minorities. Yet to an anally fixated teabagger like White, this is a trump card.

"I’m here today to tell you that homosexuality and lesbian behavior is unhealthy," claiming that gays and lesbians have higher rates of STDs than anyone else in the world, including gay bowel disease, an ailment that does not exist and is often used by religious right figures to paint gay men as diseased.

Okay, until I read the above quotes at Pam’s House Blend, I had never heard of "gay bowel disease" or "gay bowel syndrome." For one thing, it’s discredited junk science. For another, the origin of the term goes directly to the heart of my thesis: GBS is the figment of the anally fixated.

In 1976, a group of physicians in private proctologic practice in New York City coined the illness "Gay Bowel Syndrome" in reference to a constellation of gay male anorectal disorders. Through analysis of biomedical discourse and popular media, it is apparent that Gay Bowel Syndrome is an essentialized category of difference that is neither gay-specific, confined to the bowel, nor a syndrome.

To be clear, there is nothing wrong with anal sex. There is something wrong with being so preoccupied with the anal sex habits of complete strangers that one becomes a deranged proponent of punitive social policies and irrational discrimination.

So you know that expression, "Get your head out of your ass"…?

  Originally published at mooreroom.  

Lapsed!

Saturday, February 27th, 2010 by Ruben Bolling

Looking back over this week's comic (God-Man, in "Lapsed!"), I realized that it could be a miniature, comic strip version of the Coen brothers' "A Serious Man."

Kinder, Gentler Assassinations?

Saturday, February 27th, 2010 by Kevin Moore

Roger Cohen observes that “the current accountability void for U.S. targeted killing is unacceptable.” Where to begin?

For one thing, the “accountability void” for U.S. violence in general is pretty unacceptable, too. Like, say, Gitmo. Or torture. Or illegal wars. Or the hiring of mercenaries. The mercenaries themselves. I could go on…

So really, Roger Cohen is saying that the U.S. needs to set high standards for assassination. From your “liberal” New York Times.

I’ll cut him some slack: he deplores the revenge pathology informing U.S. and Israeli violence in the so-called “GWOT.” He is rightly critical of the predator drone program.

Its not clear how you get on a list to be eliminated; who makes that call; whether the decision is based on past acts (revenge, say, for the killing of C.I.A. agents in Khost, Afghanistan) or only on corroborated intelligence demonstrating that the target is planning a terrorist attack; what, if any, the battlefield limits are; and what, if any, is the basis in law

Fretting about the “messy trail” of evidence left by the Mossad agents who murdered Mahmoud al-Mabhouh in Dubai, he criticizes the “insufficient grounds for extrajudicial execution” that Israel used to rationalize the hit. And he rightly notes that “Fear cannot be a global license for the United States of America to kill.”

Revenge killings dont pass the test for me. Theyre unacceptable under international law. I want to know that any target is selected because there is verifiable intelligence that hes actively planning a terrorist attack on the United States or its allies; that the danger is pressing; that arrest is impossible; and that civilian lives are not wantonly risked.

How does that square with his endorsement of pre-emptive targeted killing? Or to be more blunt, assassination driven by fear someone will hurt us. Maybe, just maybe the reason for those Ford-era bans on assassination by U.S. agents lies in the very dynamic of fear, revenge and faulty-to-false information such plots entail.

Conservative proponents of this tactic can rightly fault Cohen for expecting targeted killings to commence only when information on the target is accurate and the threat is clear. That’s an impossible standard. War is always foggy. Predator drones are not magic bullets, they actually put thousands of miles between assassins and their targets. Which is why at least one third of drone killings are civilians. And to be more fair, there are conservative opponents of drone strikes:

These strikes violate Pakistani sovereignty, ignore the stated demands of Pakistani authorities, often cause some civilian casualties, deepen the distrust and alienation of the civilian population in the western regions of Pakistan (and turn more of the Pakistani public against the U.S.), and for all those reasons they tend to be strategically counterproductive. They cause much of the same diplomatic and political damage that the apparent Israeli involvement in Mabhouhs assassination is causing now. The difference is that the damage is being done in Pakistan instead of in Europe. Pakistans government complains, and we ignore it.

In other words, the Obama administration is digging the U.S. even further into the hole its predecessor cratered throughout the past decade. Liberals and conscientious conservatives need to stop fooling themselves that wars can be conducted humanely or “strategically” in some “hearts and minds” sense. We need to cut our losses.

Originally published at mooreroom.

This May Come As A Shock…

Friday, February 26th, 2010 by Kevin Moore

…but Congresscritters do not see inherent conflicts of interest or bribery in the close connections between campaign contributions and contract awards to their donors.

“Simply because a member sponsors an earmark for an entity that also happens to be a campaign contributor does not, on these two facts alone, support a claim that a member’s actions are being influenced by campaign contributions,” the House Committee on Standards of Official Conduct said in a unanimous statement.

Jon Lovitz could not be more disingenuous.

Originally published at mooreroom.

LiveJournal Post Only: Comments Friends Only

Friday, February 26th, 2010 by Kevin Moore

The spam from fake LJ accounts has gotten ridiculous, so from now on, I am allowing comments on LJ posts from friends only. If you are a real live person and want to comment on a post, just follow the link to the corresponding mooretoons blog post. When I post at mooretoons.com, it automatically cross-posts to this LJ account, anyway. Wordpress has much better spam-catching than LJ these days — which is sad, because LJ used to be really good at it.

Gambling going on in here, etc.

Friday, February 26th, 2010 by August J. Pollak

Republicans shocked to discover that things cost money.

My favorite part is Inhofe’s down-home folksy “I’m gonna call in my chits” to stop Bunning from filibustering a funding bill. “Calling in your chits?” It’s called (gasp!) voting with Democrats for cloture. Is that really hard to say? Answer: yes.

Unladylike Behaviour!

Friday, February 26th, 2010 by Jen Sorensen

This NYT/Reuters article about the gold medal-winning women’s hockey team made me chuckle:

Members of the Canadian team, still wearing their gold medals and uniforms, returned to the ice long after spectators had left Canada Hockey Place following their 2-0 gold medal match win over the United States.

They partied for nearly 30 minutes, drinking beer, smoking cigars and laying stretched out across the ice while joking with photographers and cleaning staff.

One player was seen by reporters climbing onboard the ice resurfacing machine parked on the ice, honking the horn several times and appearing to try to drive it.

Hockey Canada issued a statement saying it did not condone such behavior and apologized if their players’ celebrations had offended anyone.

I say drunkenly honking the Zamboni horn is entirely appropriate! Had the team tipped over the Zamboni, that may have pushed the envelope, but as far as I can tell, these ladies are being exemplary Olympic role models.

Texas Textbook Excerpts

Friday, February 26th, 2010 by Brian McFadden


click for comic

Due to the economics of textbook publishing, a couple morons on the Texas Board of Education get to determine the contents of textbooks that are used in schools throughout the country. The entire horrifying process is documented in this NY Times Magazine article. It’s similar to how California’s emissions standards set the bar for all cars sold in the US, except Texas is lowering the bar, turning it into a retarded pole on the ground.

There is some hope at the end of the article, which says that one of the leaders of the dumbification movement, Don McLeroy (AKA Don “That Fuckin’ Dum-Dum” McLeroy), is facing a serious challenge from moderate Republican Thomas Ratliff. But who knows. In Texas, isn’t a moderate Republican someone who believes Jesus and Dinosaurs coexisted, but he never rode one?

The election of Scott Brown forces me to issue this disclaimer: Not all Texans are retards, but enough of ‘em vote, just like here in good ol’ Massachusetts, the Bay State of Stupid.

While researching this cartoon, I discovered the “official” website for Footprints in the Sand. It’s INSANE. I’m not prone to giving out free ideas, but someone over there should contact Thomas Kinkade about painting some light coming out of some motherfucking Jesus-footprints.

ANNOYING PLUGS FROM A DESPERATE MAN: Please buy the Big Fat Whale book, Fun Stuff for Dum-Dums, and follow me on Twitter and Facebook.

Next Week: The Worst Ads on the Web