Archive for April, 2010

The Blog is Moving!

Friday, April 30th, 2010 by Jen Sorensen

Well, the witching hour is upon us. As of May 1, Blogger no longer supports FTP, so the SlowpokeBlog will likely not be updated at this URL again. WordPress requires that I alter the URL slightly, so (drum roll) here is the NEW location:

http://slowpokecomics.com/blog

Note that it’s very similar to the old address, but there’s no longer an “.html” at the end. The new blog is seriously not ready for primetime yet, but it at least it appears to be functioning at the moment. If you’re currently subscribing to an RSS feed, that will almost certainly go kablooey. Hang on, and I’ll try to get the new feeds set up soon. It’s all very exciting, isn’t it?

Same Great SlowpokeBlog, New Location!

Friday, April 30th, 2010 by Jen Sorensen

Welcome to the proto-neo-SlowpokeBlog. I’ve been busy with deadlines and am about to leave for New York, so I haven’t had time to work on design at all. Rest assured, it will eventually look more interesting than this. And yes, I’m allowing comments. We’ll talk more about that later. So, bookmark this space and — well, I’m going to set up Feedburner soon, so you might hold off on subscribing for now. I’ll keep you posted.

Future Fatty Foods

Friday, April 30th, 2010 by Kevin Moore


click for comic

Inspired by the Double Down’s recent emergence from the cholesterol-clogged gates of hell, I returned to the subject of extreme food, which simultaneously appalls and fascinates me.

I’m not a food prude; I love cheese and pig meat. But things are getting crazy in the garbage-food industry. Baconators, the Heart Attack Grill, and any new food Dunkin’ Donuts has come up with in the last few years take a perverse pride in the unhealthiness of their products. At least the tobacco industry had the decency to downplay the awfulness of their products.

It’s your digestive system and arteries and you can eat whatever you want. It’s none of my business if your only exercise is spending hours squeezing out five pounds of garbage on the toilet.

Extreme food requires extreme cooking, which is something Jen covered a couple weeks ago.

Why not skip the combo meal today and buy the Big Fat Whale book? It’s full of comics, and after you’re done reading them, you can eat the pages to clear out your impacted colon.

Next Week: Public Disservice Announcements


But he’s a LOYAL pedophile!

Friday, April 30th, 2010 by August J. Pollak

Here in Georgia, you can’t run for governor as a Republican unless you sign a “loyalty oath.” No, really. And even if you’re a strong candidate with $2 million of your own money, you can’t be a Republican unless you sign it.

The Georgia Republican Party has denied Ray Boyd’s attempt to run for governor after the political newcomer refused Monday to sign their loyalty oath.

In a polite but tense showdown at the state Capitol, party attorney Anne Lewis told Boyd that since he refused to sign the oath, “we’re unable to qualify you.”

Boyd said he will immediately begin preparations to run as an independent.

Boyd, a commercial real estate broker from Morgan County, burst onto the state’s political scene in March when he created a campaign committee funded entirely by $2 million of his own money. He said he intended to run for governor as a Republican and said the other seven candidates already running were too ethically challenged to serve.

So Boyd is now running as an independent- that means, of course, as a challenger to the GOP candidate, with millions to spend, because he wouldn’t sign a slip of paper that reads “I do hereby swear or affirm my allegiance to the Republican Party.”

So who did sign the slip of paper? This guy.

Rachel Gandee remembers it differently. “It got physical. It wasn’t at first. But yeah, it did get physical,” she said. In later interviews, although she initially denied that the relationship went that far, Rachel Gandee said she and McBerry had sex that fall, at his house.

Her parents — and their church — quickly became involved. That September, McBerry was summoned to a meeting with the pastor, a deacon and Ronnie Pittman.

“We told him to leave her alone. She was a child. Leave her alone. And those meetings went on an hour, or maybe an hour and a half. Each one,” the stepfather said. “After the first one, he didn’t get it, so we called him in again.”

“And then I caught him at a football game here in town,” Ronnie Pittman said. His stepdaughter, of course, was in the band. “I got on him pretty hard up there, ’cause it was just me and him.”

Linda Pittman came across two compact disks loaded with spyware that, her daughter later said, came from McBerry. Rachel used the programs to hide the messages she sent to the teacher on the family computer.

Finally, in December 2002, a couple from church caught the pair together on a dirt road — McBerry and Rachel had arrived at the rendezvous in separate cars. Linda Pittman went to the Henry County school board. McBerry abandoned his teaching job.

On Jan. 17, 2003, the mother brought McBerry before Henry County Magistrate Wesley J. Shannon, on charges of interference with custody, and contributing to the delinquency of a minor.

McBerry had an attorney. The Pittmans didn’t. Examining his files this week, Shannon said the parents didn’t present enough evidence for an arrest warrant. But they raised enough suspicions, the judge said, that he signed an order requiring McBerry to stay away from their daughter for six months.

“If I was to take an educated guess as to what I was doing at the time,” the judge said, “I was putting the ball in his court — saying, ‘Do you want to go to jail? Leave the girl alone.’ “

No one showed up at a July 17, 2003, follow-up hearing. Without the Pittmans to press any accusations, the judge had no choice but to dismiss the charges. The couple now say they regret not following up with the court action — because McBerry remained a shadow in their lives.

Rachel Gandee said her feelings for McBerry changed the day they were caught on that dirt road. Confronted, the high school teacher began pounding his car in a rage, she said. After the incident, her stepfather persuaded her that she was not safe.

At one point, McBerry returned to the church — from which he’d already been ousted — and was asked to leave, Ronnie Pittman said. His stepdaughter hid inside. On weekdays, at the wheel of her car, Rachel Gandee remembers seeing McBerry along her route to school. She began taking the bus.

Even as an adult, she still is reluctant to go into town alone, out of fear that she might see him. “I don’t want to break down in the middle of the Wal-Mart by myself,” Rachel Gandee said.

Of the Pittmans and their daughter, McBerry said their story has changed several times. He declined to cite specifics, but said he was contemplating court action.

Georgia has sent mixed messages when it comes to sexual ties between teachers and students. HB 571, a bill approved by the General Assembly on Tuesday, forbids relationships between students and teachers in the same schools.

But not, as Rachel Gandee says happened with McBerry, teachers and students from different schools. The measure also creates an exception for teachers and students who marry.

Yet consider this: On Monday, the Georgia Republican Party turned away Ray Boyd, a real estate executive with $2 million, as a candidate for governor because he refused to sign a loyalty oath of sorts.

But GOP officials say state law prevents the party of family values from blocking the candidacy of a former teacher accused of preying upon a young girl. Republicans will cash McBerry’s $4,180.18 qualifying check.

Principles, people.

(via Raine)

Why we’re going to lose horribly

Friday, April 30th, 2010 by August J. Pollak

John Cole:

If you idiots are not enthusiastic about going to the polls to vote for the Democrats and against the Republicans, you deserve what you get. And so help me, if one of you says you just haven’t gotten enough change from Obama, I’ll come to your house and punch you in the neck and kick you in the junk. And if I so much as hear one of you whine about the public option, I’ll go all Marsellus Wallace on you.

There’s a war on, and you don’t get to be Switzerland, sitting on the sidelines nursing your butthurt.

Whenever Cole does one of these rants, I struggle to figure out who he’s trying to communicate it to, since it seems to only apply to people who

A. are likely to vote Democratic anyway and at best are slightly wavering between voting Democratic and not voting at all, or
B. are made of straw.

As he is a former right-winger, I don’t understand why Cole thinks this style of argument is any better coming from the left. Seriously, how do you argue with this? In any way? “Do what I say or fuck off” is what made Armando/Big Tent Democrat the single most annoying person on the entire internet for the entire 2008 election season.

From everything I gather from these occasional diatribes, Cole seems to be angry about irrational arguments made during the health care reform debate- a bill that has since been passed and was argued months ago. I really don’t understand how yelling at random blog commenters with mocking allusions to some of the stereotypical rhetoric is going to convince wayward independents to come out and vote for Democrats again.

Oh, meanwhile, via Digby:

Since the U.S. recession began in December 2007, Congress has extended the length of unemployment benefits for the jobless three times. Now, the lawmakers may have reached their limit.

They are quietly drawing the line at 99 weeks of aid, a mark that hundreds of thousands of Americans have already reached. In coming months, the number of those who will receive their final government check is projected to top 1 million.

It’s a deadline that has rarely been mentioned in recent debates over jobless benefits, in which Republicans have delayed aid because of cost concerns. The deadline hasn’t been lost on Teauna Stephney, a 39-year-old single mother from Bothell, Washington, who said she could become homeless once her $407 weekly checks stop in June.

That’s the current step Democrats are considering with the economy right now: cutting off unemployment benefits. Suggesting that we all shut up and think about the good things Democrats have done and not focus on the negative is a great demand. While you’re at it, argue at the tides to turn at your whim. People who are facing problems are concerned about those problems. It’s really hard to insist that you should get out and vote because “Republicans will do worse” than, you know, making you homeless.

I wonder when Teauna Stephney loses her house how we’ll be able to find her to punch her in the neck.

Open Thread: Cigarettes Are Going The Way Of Paper Cones Edition

Friday, April 30th, 2010 by Barry Deutsch

Post what you want! Self-linking makes the interwebs go round.

  1. Mystery Man mourns the soon-to-come end of cigarette magic, and links to videos of some masters of cigarette manipulation. This isn’t the first time a large, well-developed field of magic has been made obsolete by the changing times; paper cone tricks (using the paper cones that stores put your purchases in, before paper bags replaced them) were once a major staple of magic acts. But once paper cones stopped being a common daily object, the tricks looked like — well, they looked like tricks. So magicians moved on.
  2. Why boycotting Arizona makes sense.
  3. What “Alas” would have looked like on Geocities.
  4. Dieting can cause heart disease, cancer. In other words, stress is bad for health.
  5. The usual right-wing nonsense about DDT seems to be going around again. Inoculate yourself by reading Bug-Girl: DDT, Junk Science, Malaria, and the attack on Rachel Carson, then Malaria and insecticide resistance, and if you want more see her collection of links.
  6. Arizona’s legislature prepares to attack free speech — basically, in order to protect white people from criticism.
  7. “Boys’ poorer reading levels in a recent study are feeding a troubling tendency to lower literacy expectations for boys, say Caryl Rivers and Rosalind C. Barnett. It’s just as destructive as the old myth about girls’ math inferiority.”
  8. Roman Vishniac: The Photographer’s Lies. Vishniac’s famous photos of Jewish life in Europe before WW2 have had a huge influence on what we imagine that Jewish life to be like. They were also extremely deceptive. Fascinating.
  9. Facebook’s Eroding Privacy Policy: A Timeline
  10. “Downfall” Hitler videos being yanked from Youtube due to copyright claim.
  11. The Silence of Our Friends is back!
  12. Rabbi Brant and an Israeli friend debate the origins of the Israel/Palestine conflict. It’s rare to see this subject debated intelligently and respectfully; I hope this becomes a series.
  13. This Is Alabama—We Speak English.
  14. Funny how the Tea Partiers, who are soooo against government intrusion, don’t seem to be objecting to Arizona’s new law.
  15. NEW DATA: 97% Of Transgender Individuals Report Being Mistreated Or Harassed At Work
  16. Bullying and the Wall of Silence. How schools claim that bullying never, ever happens here.
  17. Why do we bother putting so much effort into fighting counterfeit cash?
  18. Wall Street’s amazing, hard-to-defend, profits
  19. Rebecca Allen reviews The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms by N.K. Jemisin.
  20. A collection of comics, demonstrating that virtually all comics are funnier if the original punchline is replaced with “Christ, what an asshole.”

Illustration Friday

Friday, April 30th, 2010 by Matt Bors

A man has a …problem.

For Seattle and New York Peeps

Thursday, April 29th, 2010 by Jen Sorensen

Two events of note: Tonight I’m going to see Lloyd Dangle give his world-famous “Sly & Snide Slideshow” at the Jewelbox Theater in Belltown (2322 Second Avenue), Seattle at 7pm. Note that it does cost $15 if you are not a member of the Graphic Artists Guild.

Then, in NYC on Monday, I’ll be giving a brief talk and taking Q&A at the Aronson award ceremony, along with other winners from The Nation, Mother Jones, and the New York Times. The event is open to the public. Details: 6 p.m., Monday, May 3 in the 8th-Floor Faculty Dining Room in the Hunter West Building, 68th Street and Lexington Avenue.

THIS WEEK’S COMIC on boingboing

Thursday, April 29th, 2010 by Ruben Bolling

This week's comic:  HOW TO DRAW GOD-MAN!

I'd ordinarily resist using God-Man two weeks in a row, but you'll see why I couldn't resist.

Arizona Boycott

Thursday, April 29th, 2010 by Kevin Moore

Maybe it’s something about spring training that turns states into assholes.

For a state that relies so heavily on tourism, Arizona’s new immigration law is a pretty dumb move. But it’s not unprecedented. As a whole, the US is a giant pain in the ass for tourists, with all the fingerprinting and general “guilty until proven innocent” vibe we give them at customs. Arizona just expanded the hassle to its own citizens, particularly the brown ones.

I’m not going to write much about the “Papers, Please” law since it’s been covered so much this week, but I want to direct you to Matt’s cartoon, which went up within hours of its passing.

I’d boycott Arizona, but I’ve been doing that my entire life without even trying. PF Chang’s, Go Daddy, John “My Friend” McCain? Arizona, quit making garbage so I can boycott you!