Cartoonists With Attitude

Jihadi Jane has thrown a wrench in our racist conception of what a terrorist looks like. White women are the new threat and as a cartoonist - their favorite target -I’m particularly worried. I’m a single guy in white-ass Portland so I’m going to start being extra careful around the ladies. Cartoons of the Prophet Muhammad rile up jihadists more than carpet bombing a village of innocents. They never let it go. I haven’t forgotten this e-mail.

If you enjoy the third cartoon for the week and have some spare change, throw it in the tip jar on the right. I’m trying to make them happen as often as time and inspiration and money allow.

Monday: Keep Boston Safe!

Here are some caricatures I drew recently. The Dark One…

and Mitch McConnell

Putting my e-mail address at the bottom of my Glenn Beck cartoon has prompted more readers than usual to write in with both positive and negative reactions, but so far no dice on the life-extension technology.

I filled out my 2010 census form yesterday. It took all of two minutes, but I noticed a peculiar phrase at the beginning. The form said I should “count all people, including babies…”

Including babies? What sort of person wouldn’t already think of a baby as a unique person worthy of counting? Who but a communist would need that clarified for them - or feel the need to clarify it to to others? DO WE NOT COUNT THE FETUS?!

Conservatives believe all sorts of nonsense about the census and, not surprisingly, oppose filling out the race portion of the form for fear of… I don’t know, a non-white or a non-missile getting a Federal penny? Beck bizarrely posits, “they are asking the race question to try to increase slavery” and many conservatives will be writing in “American” for their race. (Upon informing my brother of this, he replied, “That sounds like a race of assholes.”)

Now I know Beck doesn’t literally believe people have been alive since 1790, but since the things he believes about the census are almost as absurd I decided to run with it for the sake of a joke. Also, this comic is merely an illustrated version of a blog post I did last week, then took down, so to make up for that I will have another cartoon this Friday on Jihadi Jane.

Karl Rove’s book topped Amazon’s bestseller list, unseating “Rework,” whose authors (or publisher, most likely) responded with a brilliant Rovian attack ad.

Time for turds.

(click here to view)

Gordon Campbell Freelance Mar 16, 2010 EditorialCartoonists.com

Warning: You are in Turdland! A place where large mounds of Photoshop doodie fertilize the Kalashnikov Cacti.

(click here to view)

Douglas MacGregor The News-Press Mar 16, 2010 EditorialCartoonists.com

Douglas MacGregor should probably take his own advice and stop filling out March Madness brackets on the job. That way, he’ll have more than five minutes to photoshop the same plane all over his comic.

The Catholic Church, the most prolific pedophile ring in history - even establishing its own city, has recently booted toddlers out of one of its schools for having parents that apparently love each other, but also happen to have vaginas. This kind of discrimination, by a prolific pedophile ring no less, should probably be illegal. But so should pedophile rings. I’m outraged by the story while also pleased that the chances of these two children being molested by pedophiles has now been significantly reduced.

This story comes as news that the pedophile ring’s current leader, Joe Ratzinger, didn’t blink when a known pedophile was placed under him in a position where he could rape more children and rob them of their innocence, which, of course, he did.

Wednesday: Glenn Beck. He’s crazy.

Congrats to Lloyd Dangle on his 1,000th Troubletown strip. Bors Blog salutes you!

A woman goes on a tear with her stroller - one she’s using as a shopping cart.

And an illustration for the ACLU on military vs. civilian trials for alleged terrorists.

Glenn Beck on the Census:

If you were offended back in 1790 about slavery and that everyone should count the same, do not answer the race question. How dare you. How dare you.

If you were offended back in 1790 please contact me re: life-extension technology.