Cartoonists With Attitude

Boston’s socialist Common was occupied by the Tea Party today to protest socialism and melanin. I stopped by for a couple hours and soaked up the stupid.

There were a decent amount of people there, probably a couple thousand, but I’d guess half were rubberneckers like myself or counter-protesters. Even if you lump us all in the same count, it was nowhere near the size of the Iraq War protest seven (!) years ago.

More pictures after the jump!

There was a little row of booths selling dumb t-shirts and even dumber ideas. The “Don’t Tread On Me” flags seemed to be the biggest sellers.

I have no objection to the sausage stand. Those things are good.

Well dummy, I’d stop calling you that if you wrote down some informed, intelligent shit.

The “Y” is stuck in his (her?) armpit, but I think “I AM ANGR” is a much better slogan for the Tea Party movement.

You can hang a rape whistle on your wallet chain to stop that from happening.

Yeah, media! WHERE ARE YOU? Too afraid to cover their TRUTH?

Oh, there you are, pointing your cameras at their dumb faces instead of fact-checking any of the stupid shit they say.

And that reason was protesting the extra tines Britain added to our forks.

Going Galt is the new slang for getting some fried dough.

This is the best photo of Palin I could get. Minutes after getting driven right up to the stage, she gave her usual rambling, incoherent version of a speech. When she was done, she hopped right off the stage and her motorcade was out of there.

The other speakers were just as bad. Some local talk-radio nobodies bitching about Barney Frank, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi and some guy named Barack Hussein.

There were many flavors of counter-protesters too.

Some had obviously fake signs like this guy. But check out the sign in the background to the left. He must mean there is not enough time to give all the liberals hugs. He couldn’t mean anything violent, right?

These folks marched and shouted among the tight Tea Party crowd while Palin was jabbering about freedom and big, bad gubbamint.

And these folks politely stood off towards the back.

There was only one instance were things seemed to get a little tense. These guys were standing in front of this trailer teabaggers could sign. It was like the Declaration of Dumdependence…ON WHEELS!

And one of the Tea Party organizers took offense, initiating the lamest and least threatening stare-down I’ve ever seen:

Overall, it was a peaceful event. A peaceful mouth-breathing, selfish, xenophobic, war-mongering event.

I posted a few more photos on Flickr, if you’d like to see some more dumb stuff.

click for comic

Here are some jokes for tax time.

I have nothing especially long-winded to write about them, so I’ll use this space to ask you to please consider buying the BFW book, Fun Stuff for Dum-Dums. It’s a bargain and goes a long way in keeping me in business as newspapers continue to struggle at figuring their shit out. And a big sloppy, wet thanks to everyone who’s already bought it!

I’m still in the early stages of planning new BFW t-shirts. A busy April and May probably means I won’t be making any decisions until June, so if you have any input, send it my way!

Belated news about original art. BFW has been all digital for over six months now, so there’s a limited supply of bristol board inked with my dick and fart jokes.

Next Week: Going Green Guide

click for comic

Flagpole sitting was a real thing, and every time I read about it, that dumb song from the Peep Show intro pops into my head.

Sadly, the last panel reflects my own philosophy towards covering politics in the comic strip. Even though I’m primarily a dick & fart jokesmith, I am deeply shamed to have something in common with the mainstream media.

If you already think I’m a dick, you should see how I interact with chuggers. Man, I hate those fucks. I’m a cartoonist covered in hair. Do I look like I have money?

Now I’ll be a bit of a hypocrite and do some chugging of my own. “Hello stranger! Let me be inappropriately friendly with you for a minute. Do you have a second to check out the BFW store? Or what about signing up for my VERY IMPORTANT UPDATES through Twitter and Facebook?”

“You, don’t?” Turn on passive-aggressive stink-eyes of hate. “That’s cool. Have a great day!”

Next Week: Crappy Electronics Show

click for comic

Consider this the companion piece to this cartoon. In another three years, when these two quagmires are still dragging on, I might do another comic where they team up in a drug-fueled raunchy comedy, kind of like Harold and Kumar.

A couple helicopter crashes and Michael Hoh resigning have improved things a bit this week, but Afghanistan has never gotten much attention. We can blame the media for some of it, but let’s not pretend that Americans have a deep thirst for knowledge that’s being stifled by the likes of Fox News. We’s a bunch of morons! The fate of Balloon Boy captivated the nation, but when it comes to foreign children getting blown up by Predator drones, we couldn’t give two shits.

I’m not excusing myself either. I love being a big ol’ ignorant goofball making fart jokes. I sleep better that way. If you want far more regular coverage of this mess, colleagues like Ted Rall, Kevin Moore, and Matt Bors are a better bet. (Sorry I didn’t link to anyone else, but my fart jokes don’t write themselves!)

And yeah, I created a Twitter account for Afghanistan War. I doubt it’ll get as much attention from me as the Tweeting Toaster.

Next Week: Internet Knockoffs

click for comic

I started out with a cartoon mocking Glenn Beck, but my mind drifted off into absurd areas and my raging hatred of Cokie Roberts and Peggy Noonan.

Next Week: Halloween Tips n’ Tricks

Click to enlarge

Cause men! and women! are DIFFERENT! in HILARIOUS ways! More on this topic later.

Cagle has a two-part video interview with me and Jen Sorensen (of Slowpoke fame) from the AAEC convention in Seattle last week. Even Editor & Publisher took note!

Click to enlarge

In the wake of a U.S. airstrike that killed more than 100 Afghan civilians, the mainstream media wonders: “How will those dead kids harm American PR?”

As FAIR puts it in their analysis of mainstream coverage: “One has to wonder about the values of a press where U.S. taxpayer-funded slaughter of civilians elicits journalists’ concern not about victims, but about the war’s popularity with the population having record numbers of bombs dropped on them and how that might hamper U.S. strategic goals.”

By the way, Obama’s top security adviser says he has no plans to halt the airstrikes because “we have to have a full complement of our offensive military power when we need it.”

For my previous cartoons on this subject, see “War Marketeers!” and “Milly Jones: America-Hating PR representative”.

I did another one of those things! What’s that? You don’t remember? That’s OK. I almost forgot too.

As part of a Twitter joke at the Globe’s expense, I made a link to Google News results for the word fart. Turns out farts are frequently in the news. I have since subscribed to the feed for that page. It is fascinating. I have also done the same for feces.

TANGENT: I don’t mean to be a feces populist, but if you spell it faeces, who you foolin’? No amount of fancy spelling is going to make anyone forget you’re talking about shitting. Just call it ass-daisies if you’re too delicate for shit.

As for the Globe, its situation is really not funny. It’s like a bizarro Seattle, where the PI is replaced with a paper from Boston, the bizarro-Seattle. Don’t believe me? Both are liberal, coastal cities, but Seattle’s Big Dig might not happen, and unlike Kurt Cobain, the members of Aerosmith didn’t commit suicide, which they should have, after their first album.